I appreciate that you are a social climber in every sense of the word and that you act like your shit doesn't stink, I really get it, I do. But let's be honest here Olivia, you're out of you league. It's one thing to live a life of shallow and bitter jealousies but it is far more dangerous to swim with the sharks of reality television. I mean, you're from Connecticut and your trying to step to Aussies? Do I need to remind you that Whitney went to USC? That's straight hood right there, don't play girl! Oh no you didn't!
You're cousin Nevan is utterly disgusting in every sense of the word and probably a good rule of thumb for what you would likely look like without all of your nips and tucks to your weasely face. He's like the real life version of Robert Downey Jr.'s character from Less Than Zero only way less forgivable. Perhaps while he is freeloading in your closetless apartment and leaving his skanky socks out for your company to pick up you can offer him some money so the next time he gets arrested for soliciting a cock eyed street whore in Palm Beach he can pay for his blow job with cash instead of Oxycontin. Did I just say that? Oh yeah, I did.
Well, I could include the parts where you have tried to buy yourself into NY's high society and even your publicist couldn't fix your given status of Persona Non Grata, but I'll just cut to the chase. If I have to look at you roll your muskrat eyes one more time or flip your Shirley Temple weave, I am going to go OFF! Don't bring shit up to Whit Whit at work and then snap at her about keeping your work relationship and your social relationship separate. You brought it up bitch!
In conclusion, I can't wait to see what is coming to you cause it's going to be something colossal. All scumbag, hater wenches always get their due and yours will hopefully be in the form of dating Spencer Pratt. Suck it.