Last night was the finale to a far too short series of Bravo's Real Housewives of New Jersey. Instead of a recap, I feel like a big thank you is order.
Dear Beverly/Danielle, Thank You for showing me the later effects of Botox on once normal eyebrows.
Thank you for showing me that a 26 year old man can look older than a 45 year old woman.
Thank you for saying pussy on basic cable and making the world cringe.
Thank you for putting Cop Without A Badge on the dinner table/my summer reading list.
Dear Dina, You are more or less awesome and I truly mean that. Your the mother of Lexi who seems like a good kid and not a spoiled brat. Lexi may hoard stuffed animals under her bed and a candy factory in her drawer, but you have the good sense to say things like, "That's Gross" when she told you she was going to wear a bikini top and shorts while in Greece. More importantly, you are the owner of Grandma Wrinkle the cat and that makes you a star in my book.
Thank you for bringing the phrase, "I Cannot Stomach You" into my life.
Dear Jacqueline, Thank you for "staying out of it". YEAH RIGHT!
But seriously, I like that your husband Chris told everyone they were acting like a bunch of fools. I couldn't disagree more but at least he had the balls to say it.
Dear Teresa, You are pretty much like every girl I grew up with and that's a good thing. Thank you for teaching your kids to say, "Fabulous!" when they pose for pictures and thank you for showing the world what happens when someone is out of line at a dinner party you are hosting.
Thank you for flipping that table while screaming, "Prostitution Whore!" at the same time. You are not only a beacon of class and elegance, you are my hero.
Dear Caroline, There are no words. Thank you for EVERYTHING!